19 Confessions of Caretakers and Lifesavers

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Caretakers And Lifesavers Share Secrets About Their Jobs: “We Just Aren’t Allowed To Tell You, But We Know Exactly What’s Wrong With You” #Caretakers #Lifesavers #Share #Secrets #About #Jobs

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I recently requested that people share the secrets of their jobs anonymously. The ones I got from caregivers and lifesavers really kind of stood out among the 538 secrets I got. Thus, they are now.

1. “Rep for a medical device. You are aware of the difficult spine surgery you just had? There’s a good chance that your surgeon handled crucial aspects of your care for the first time while using specialized equipment, under my direct supervision in real-time, with only a week or so of product training and no formal medical training.”

A spinal x-ray

2. “I was a Red Cross certified lifeguard and swim instructor for almost a decade. Some public pools will actively prevent their lifeguards from obtaining more advanced first aid/lifesaving certifications so that they cannot be held liable in the event of an emergency requiring that level of care. For example, they don’t want their lifeguards to be certified in using BVMs (bag valve masks) or other equipment because then the lifeguard is obligated to provide that care if it is required, and this opens the facility to more liability if something goes wrong and a complaint or lawsuit is brought against them.”

CPR training with a dummy
3. “We don’t care if you forgot to shave under your arms or if you have moles when you get your mammogram. Although cleaning under your breasts is preferred, we will still position you the same even if you haven’t. But don’t make it strange, please. Do you like to rub women’s boobs all day long? Although it will be funny, you just made it awkward. You are receiving a medical procedure from us. We are not at all enjoying it, but we can do so without you sexualizing our work or the unique service we offer. Avoid making it strange.”
Mammogram image
4 “I work as a hospital’s X-ray technician. We aren’t allowed to tell you, but we know exactly what’s wrong with you. Officially, the radiologist must interpret the X-rays. We can also tell if you are about to fart on us if we take an X-ray of your abdomen.”
X-ray
5. “Facilities for assisted living are filthy. We are not a nursing home, despite the nursing staff. The same standards of cleanliness or care are not expected of us. In the ten years I’ve worked there, the state inspectors have never visited my unit. We are completely undetected.”
A hospital hallway

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